It’s Christmas for chrissakes.

Happy Holidays. I'm cool with that sentence. The problem I have is with the whole "do not say Christmas, don't do it, just don't."  For the love of the PC god!

December 25th is Christmas people. That's when supposedly the baby Jaysus stuck in some itchy hay got three shitty gifts from kings who were lost following the wrong cardinal point star and now we must repent forever by buying crap at Walmart.


Yeah, that's what it said in the bible, 3 shitty gifts.


If one wants to wish me a Happy Hanukkah as I leave a store, I'd be thrilled as well! It's the thought behind the sentence. If I didn't celebrate Christmas, which I'm not sure I'm doing it right anyway, and someone wished me anything but harm, and go with an enthusiastic "Thank you, you too!"

"Happiest of Kwanzaa Ma'am!"

"Right back at ya kid, don't call me ma'am."

And you just know Bhuddha hisself in his festive sandals would be wishing me "Joy and may you be free from suffering and the root of all suffering." I'm good with that.

Say whatever you want to say, avoid company policy all 'round, just don't be rude. That's my motto. Heck, if the service I've been getting lately in stores is an example of what will come, say "Happy Shitty Day" and I'd be pleased as punch.

For instance, the wee girl at the counter of a chocolate boutique is standing there smacking her gum, whilst fiddling with the iPod nods her head in my direction in lieu of "can I help you" or a simple "bonjour" can bite me eh? I swear if she as much had said Happy Holidays, I was coming over that counter.

In fact I vote to ban the now obligatory Happy Holidays. I am not on Holidays. I am not a Happy Holidayer. And certainly wishing me to be so, is actually offensive to my sensibilities.

The word "Christmas" is offensive to some? Cool. But if I'm wishing you a freakin' Merry one, it's the thought that counts! It isn't the time to give me a political speech about what December 25th represents. When and if we abstain from all Christian dork infested rituals, and that means NOT giving presents on that day and NOT singing carols and NOT decorating, and everyone wearing hemp clothing, well then I will delete this whole shebang.

Then we will all be members of PETA and eat lint.

Happy Freakin' Lint Day.

Carry on.

Comments

I love how your mind works Kathleen!

Sue & HotRod
stivafan said…
Happy Serve-hubby-all-meals-in-bed Day! BTW: The confirmation word for posting this comment is blesec, so happy dry wheat day.
marie said…
seasons greetings!!

Popular posts from this blog

The Dalmatian, the Mute Deer Goat and now....

Playing sandwich chicken with a hoe.