Botox or Anti-Depressants?

Now, there's a million dollar idea, I can shoot Paxil straight into my forehead. I can see the ad now...

A woman (why is it always a chick?) running on the beach in a bikini, perfect body, she's 19, no lines on her face, if she tries to frown, she giggles instead, wind swept hair, she can lift a car over her head she has so much energy, she drops car on herself, she never cries out, unable to feel pain, she's oh so happy....

[Stop taking this medication if you are lactating a giant pig, if you are dead, if you experience unexpected urge to throat punch random strangers- unless they deserve it. Side effects may include wrinkles, depression, urge to write blogs, delusional ideas of being married to movie stars....]

Wait, what?

Either way, I need to stop worrying about things.

Worrying begets insomnia which makes challenging tasks almost impossible. You know, things like pouring orange juice, opening the lid of a laptop before typing, operating heavy mascara. I can never get that "on/off" light switch right these days.

I've looked into getting a lobotomy, I fear they may cut out my love of chocolate. That would not do. Plus all that drooling would ruin my knitting. And then where would I be with my drooly coming off of chocolate non knitter self I ask you?

I bought retinol cream. It tastes weird.


Comments

stivafan said…
Heh, heh, you said retinol, bikini, and lactating!
24 August 2011 at 02:15
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