Introducing the Dalmatian. Part 1.
This is his eyeball. It's the one he picked me with.
This is the view he eyeballs from my Nanny's chair.
Just so we're clear.
Some people need their eyeballs checked.
4 times.
4 times.
How Jaysus met his maker. Part 1.
What? This is a perfectly normal photo. Oh, the story attached to it? Yes, I see your point. Well, it all started over a year ago, the best set-ups do. Near my home there was a 6ft giant metal shark as a business front ornament for a gas station. You know, nothing says gas like a shark, frankly eHarmony was certainly involved, so perfect the match. I drove directly into their parking lot hearing angels in my head, or that could have been the people I ran over. I stood there gob smacked, grinning. It's on metal posts 6ft in the air, sexy subtle. I wasn't really hugging it, I was trying to see if I could budge it more than a centimeter. Then a thought occurred to me that my actions could be interpreted as stealing, and after running over those people, I may be in trouble. "Not for sale" gas station man said when I offered to buy it. He had to repeat himself apparently I had gone deaf. Back at home Johnny Depp laughed at my description, but od...
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